aqilah musfirah
"The girl in the mirror wasn't who I wanted to be
and her life wasn't the one I wanted to have"

Proud to be a mariner.
I don't make promises that I can't keep.

[view my profile]

Friday, July 30, 2010

"Don't you worry, I'll be fine.."

Don't you think that's the biggest lie, ever??

Anyway! There's only about two days left for my holiday. Will be going back to Labuan soon, where the most "enthusiastic" place is - UK (not United Kingdom , but Ujana Kewangan), which provides us.. uhm..err.. nothing.

I'm definitely gonna miss my cats :(
Excuse the hair. That's my morning hair =.=" That's Milo ;D All grown up, huh? Huhu ;( I feel like a mother who couldn't watch her child growing up =.="

My kitties semua manja2.
Pandai minta dukung. (which is so dangerous 'cuz if u don't notice them, they'll climb on you, which is very painful as they dig their claws deep into your skin. And my skin now mcm org kena dera. Faham2 lah kenapa. lol.)
They can fall asleep while you're carrying them around, as well. Aww.. so cute..
Stop being so adorable! ;'( Otherwise I'll feel empty when they're not around huhu
Oh BTW I have 5 kittens now. 7 grown-up kitties. And 2 strays(which one of them we named 'Tua' cuz he's obviously very old. Frankly, I'm a bit surprised he's still alive hahaha) that keep coming back for food =.="
Which makes up a total of 14 felines.
And I live in a terrace house. Duii.. That's so not appropriate. But we would never do things like getting rid of any of the cats.
'Cuz that's some sort of animal cruelty. And we need to stop cruelty towards animals!
Animals want to live, too!
They're innocent!
Ok, I'll stop now.

Enjoy :)

Always Be My Baby
-David Cook-

We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine
Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die, noooooo

You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me

Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I ain't gonna cry no
And I won't beg you to stay
If you're determined to leave girl
I will not stand in your way
But inevitably you'll be back again
Cause ya know in your heart babe
Our love will never end no

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time cant erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I know that you'll be back girl
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder oooohhh
I know that, you'll be right back
Ooooh! baby believe me it's only a matter of time

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my, baby....

You'll always be apart of me (you will always be)
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on (we will linger on)
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
You will always be my baby

Looking forward to watch:

YOU AGAIN: Movie Trailer. Watch more top selected videos about: Kristin Chenoweth, Andy Fickman

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Tell me what you want, what you really, really want..

I wanna,
I wanna,
I wanna..
I~~ wanna rock n roll all night.. n party everyday
*bunyi gitar & drum & tambourine*

That's not what I want. At least not right now.
For now, I want:
A part-time job
-because I think I'm running out of money but at the same time I'm sorta a "shopaholic". I need to buy just a little something to make me feel good. And that actually scares me =.=
-which is impossible, me to get a part-time job, I mean. Sebab saya study di KML, which restricts students from going out of campus on weekdays (Even on weekends, we have to be back BEFORE 6.30 p.m., so much for the prison life,huh??) . Which is why, I'm thinking about moving to UiTM. They have intakes later in August. Besides, UiTM is a recognized university, and I bet KMLis NOT a recognized college.

BUT! I haven't make my decision yet. So here's my plan:
1) I'll try applying for UiTM
2) If I was chosen, then I'll think about should I or should I not accept the offer?
3) If I'm not chosen, I won't let myself be devastated. I have so much fun at KML already, anyway.
But, but.. what about part-time job and the money I'm about to earn??
Stop. Don't think 'bout that 1st =.="

Wah2, seriusnya entry kali ini. X puas ati pla. LOL.
So here you go, I'll reveal my most embarrassing moment, ever:
[click to enlarge]
sepa yg sudah taw, diam2 hahaha! aha! haaa..... .. 

Oh well!

I'm off to bed now. *Yawn*

Confession #34: It hurts when you are just another stupid mistake of a person whom you used to be very, very close to.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Misguided Ghost

Okay, I'm getting better so I'm definitely not going to bed early tonight.

Jennie texted me just now asking me on how to put on Bedak Sejuk. "Tebal-tebal atau nipis-nipis? Maw campur air ka? Pekat atau cair?" LOL! Skema betul! Sukati ko la maw pakai macamana bha. Ndakan rosak kulit no matter how you use it. Seriously, Jen, maybe it's your nature to be so humorous. Hahaha ;D

I'm currently listening to Miranda Cosgrove. Technically, Jennie was the one who introduced me to her music. And I've gotta say: I ♥ it, especially Shakespeare, Disgusting and Oh oh.
Doesn't sound familiar? She's the girl from Nickelodeon's iCarly.
OR the little girl, Megan, from Drake & Josh, also on Nickelodeon. She's all grown up now.
I used to watch both of the sitcoms every evening before I went to KML. I know it's mainly for kiddies. But who cares?? I hate the phrases "I'm too old for ----", "You're too old for ----".. Oh blahblahblah! You're never too old for anything! Not even for cartoons. Hey, even my Dad watches Tom & Jerry once in a while. Sometimes, watching people who couldn't wait to grow up so much makes me feel irritated. BECAUSE, they become somebody else. Too cool for this and that. Oh puh-lease!  Being mature is so much more than that. And it starts from being yourself. But anyway, it's their lives, they'll live it their ways. Esh, TER-merapu la pula pasal mature immature segala =.=

Hmm.. pa lagi ah

Teda keja bha ne..

Oh! Right! About the title, have you heard the song before? It's Paramore's. Nice song! :D

Right click here and choose "save link as" or "save target as" to download.
Lyrics?? Click here 

In the mood for old songs. One of my faves:

saya suka dengar ni lagu time emo2 =.=" LOL

Bha, enough 'bout songs. Mcm maw revamp blog tapi malas. Maybe I'll just replace the banner.

Confession #32: Saya tersangat-sangat sedih hari ini. No one knows why but me, myself and I, AND of course, God. Akhirnya, saya menangis juga. I've been holding these tears for I-don't-know-how-long. Mereka sangka saya tabah. I feel like a hypocrite. But then again, who isn't? Should I be ;-) or ;-( ??

Confession #33: I don't know what should I do with those stuffs. Burn? Bury? Throw away? One thing for sure, keeping 'em with me is not the right thing to do. Yes, I know that. But at the same time, I'm reluctant to get rid of 'em. Now it's as though I'm hearing some hideous voices saying, "You're such a fool, Qila", "Reality check! You're keeping them for nothing! They just get you teary-eyed every single time you look at them", "Wake up, girl. You deserve better than this". Oh, God. Gimme a break!


Perry! Do something!
What the-.. !! ... I can't believe you bailed on me! For yet another secret mission!

Oh well, I still ♥ Perry the Platipus. Hahaha :D

Saaayang si Perry! XD

Thursday, July 22, 2010


Oh! by SNSD
Cute la this song. LOL.

* * * * * * *
Finally I'm in KK, again. Good to be home :)  Malangnya, saya tidak berapa sihat hari ini. Oh no! =.=" duii teda mood la.. Changed the song for my bloggie.. Do you like this song, too? Well if you do, check out the lyric, then. Atau ko sudah hafal ne?? *cakap sama laptop usang*

Don't Forget
-Demi Lovato-

Did you forget
That I was even alive
Did you forget
Everything we ever had
Did you forget
Did you forget
About me

Did you regret
Ever standing by my side
Did you forget
What we were feeling inside
Now I'm left to forget
About us

But somewhere we went wrong
We were once so strong
Our love is like a song
You can't forget it

So now I guess
This is where we have to stand
Did you regret
Ever holding my hand
Never again
Please don't forget
Don't forget

We had it all
We were just about to fall
Even more in love
Than we were before
I won't forget
I won't forget
About us

But somewhere we went wrong
We were once so strong
Our love is like a song
You can't forget it

Somewhere we went wrong
We were once so strong
Our love is like a song
You can't forget it
At all

And at last
All the pictures have been burned
And all the past
Is just a lesson that we've learned
I won't forget
please don't forget about us

But somewhere we went wrong
Our love is like a song
But you won't sing along
You've forgotten
About us

Beautiful song, eh?? I ♥ her songs ^^ The words to her songs mean so much to me :')

p.s. Currently addicted to glee :DDDD

Confession #29: Guess I'm not such a risk-taker anymore. I just can't endure walking with an invisible dagger stuck in my chest anymore. Never again.

Confession #30: I'm a loner mcm lagu CN Blue tu. lol! No, seriously, I don't care being alone but I do mind being lonely. There's a difference. But don't get me wrong, I ♥ all my friends. Frankly, I don't have a large number of friends, but I wouldn't trade them for a thousand of friends. Because the truth is, I'd rather have FEW true friends than MILLIONS of plastic friends, who come and go just like seasons. Oh! Again! Don't get it wrong, just because I'm a loner, doesn't mean I resent making new friends XDD

Confession #31: I'm craziest when I'm really, really down and on the verge of a breakdown. I'll laugh my head off like a lunatic even if there's nothing funny, at all. 'Cuz laughing makes me feel better.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Chocolate ♥

Puuuulaaaangggg!!! Rabu tengahari boleh pulang sudahhhh!!!!!!! So watch out, KK, watch out, 1B. Ngehehehe.. Qiqi Lala, Ikimasu!^^

I've already spent RM80 for chocolates. And it looks like it's not enough. Oh well, what to do. X cukup duit bha.. huhu

Oh gosh, why did I put it like I don't have any exam coming up. In fact, the exam is on the day after tomorrow. My preparation? Err.. Boleh2 lah.. (Padahal pra-UPS punya result bkin malu. EEE.. what's wrong with me owh??) Just wish me luck okie!

p. s. I lost my Bio Q&A reference book. I must've left it in Bilik Tutoran 20. But when I went back there, no sign of my book. Stupid la that person who took that book. I've written my name and my tutorial group on it, so clearly, it's someone's. Don't make it like your own la. It's been more than a week now. Do I really have to make an announcement and provide my phone number, as well? And even if I do so, would you be kind enough to return it to me??

Thursday, July 15, 2010


Jennie told me about her childhood superhero and guess who was it??

No, it wasn't Superman.

No, not Batman, either.

Spiderman? Nope!

Yes, it was someone(?) you've never heard of before. Tomato Man. =.=" LOL! Weirdo Jen!

p.s. I'm going home! Yesh! Either on Wed or Thurs next week. The first thing I wanna do?? Hug my TV at home :P 2nd: Shopping, of course! So KK, here I come! :D

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Laugh your tears away

I haven't been crying for more than 2 months now, which is weird 'cuz I used to be a crybaby. Sikit sikitttt nangis.. Problem yg tersangat2 kecil pun maw nangis. Kena marah sikit pun nangis. Apa lagi kalaw problem besar. Huh sampai tertidur tu menangis. Terus tu, besok2 bangun pagi sambung lagi menangis =.="
The last time I cried was during orientation week. Almost every day and night, as far as I can remember. Especially at the mosque. When I was sitting next to my BFF. Yes, you know who you are. Lol. Ingatkan dya x perasan =.=" but there's nothing to be ashamed of crying beside her, anyway. I did that soooo many times before ;P Among my BFFs, I think dia la paling byk nmpk saya nangis. Hahaha masih ingat tym form 2 dulu saya nangis depan dia sebab kucing saya hilang. =.=""""""

I feel stronger here. Well, meantally, at least. Physically, I still look pale and vulnerable and bustak  and- oh! Et cetera! To make it short, let's just say I look like a living zombie here, as always. Sure, I can cover it up with make-ups and all, but to be honest, I'm not a fan of make-ups. Paling2 pun saya guna concealer and lip balm only (tapi suka kasih make-up I'm not stressed out, though. I don't feel as though I'm at home here, but I feel  more suited here. Probably because in here, time pass by without me knowing and I'm liking it . Maybe these zits I'm getting is just because of my imbalance level of hormones. Ceh ceh pandai2 ;pppp

Confession #26:
"Her favorite song will say more about her than her own mouth ever will"
(yes, that's the kind of girl I am)

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

Confession #27: I can't believe I'm saying this, but I miss my high school life :'( I feel like visiting All Saints and all the classes I've been in once and reminisce every single moment I had there.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

Confession #28:
"Laughter is the best medicine."
Yes, it is.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

p.s. Aiyn! It's really sad that you had to move to IPG. But I hope you are doing fine there. Ingat janji ko maw jadi the hottest English teacher in Keningau. Hehehe GOOD LUCK! Keep in touch with us here, jan ko lupa kami2 di sini ni XD
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