The sunflower that grows at the end of Spring

On the other shore of sadness,

It is said that there is a smile,

Finally we arrived.

But what are we waiting for?

The purpose is not to run away,

It’s to chase after dreams

We should have gone out to travel

On that summer day so long ago

In a place worn down by sadness,

something called a miracle is waiting

Yet we are still searching

for the sunflower that grows at the end of Spring

The warrior who awaits the morning light

before he can clasp it with red nails,

his tears glitter and fall

Even if we’ve grown used to loneliness

only relying on the light of the moon

We have to fly away with featherless wing

Just go forward, just a little further

Even tomorrow, if you see it

Though there isn’t a sigh either.

Like a ship going against the current flow.

Right now, go forward, move ahead.

Even if it cuts through the rain and clouds,

The wet roads shine,

Only the dark will teach,

A stronger and stronger light,

Be strong, go forward, move ahead.

credits: parkminnie

2015

WARNING: This entry will probably sound very, very cliche.

2014 was NOT a good year.

I've cried (way) too much.

Lost myself.

Lost almost everything.

But then again,

I DID laugh a lot, too.

I DID gain people I can trust.

I DID dive a lot.

I DID had some pretty good times.

And most importantly... I DID get a Degree. (God knows what I had to go through to achieve THAT)

(Here comes the cliche part) My life was never perfect. In fact, it was FAR from perfect (Again, I cannot explain why), but it has perfect moments. More than I could possibly count. And I am SO grateful for those precious moments. Blessings do come in many ways, indeed.

So goodbye 2014, and Helloooo 2015 (The fact that I'm posting this on 2nd of January 2015 is just a bit off, I'm so sorry). May this year bring us happiness and prosperity. In Shaa Allah :)

...

I should be home right now.
.
.
.
But I'm not. I wanted to and I could be there, but I chose not to.

This is not me opening up about the story of my life.

Nor is this some sort of confessions (Wait. Is there any difference, at all?).

In fact, I don't even KNOW what this is,

It's not like I have no one to talk to.

I do, I have people who actually CARE for me.

But of all the things I am, "selfish" and "self-centered" are not one of them.

No matter how much they care for me, I'd NEVER want to be an extra baggage to them when they could barely handle their own.

Plus talking about reality (MY reality) makes me feel weak.

In fact,blogging about this has already made me feel 1000000000 times weaker.

And I hate feeling weak (Who doesn't?). 

Just posting about this makes me feel like I'm betraying myself.

Once upon a time, I promise to share happy stuff and only happy stuff on this blog. 

So I deleted most of the depressing past entries. 

Sad posts don't really go well with the decorations of this cute, pinkish blog, anyway.

Guess that didn't work out.

(OMG I feel like an attention-seeking over-reacting very-brokenhearted dumb, immature, infatuated girl who'd just got dumped by her jerk boyfriend and thinks that it's the end of her life, I SO friggin' hate myself right now)

Living in denial will have to make do, for now.

P.S. You DID NOT read this (Compulsion *as seen on The Vampire Diaries, a TV show which only gets stupider with time and only aims to please the DELENA fanbase nowadays*)